Saturday, November 5, 2011

Do you ever?

Do you ever look in the mirror or your reflection in the window as you eat?  I recommend it, especially when you binge, so you can see the disgusting reality of it all.  I say this not in judgement, but in truthfulness as I consumed many calories in a short period of time yesterday.   But I caught a glimpse of myself in the window and had to acknowledge that I HATE that part of me when it becomes uncontrollable.

It happened, I am moving on...

I always try to reflect on why I get that way, and I suppose there is never just one answer.  But here are a few thoughts:

1.  Like I mentioned the other day, I'm trying to *rush* to get 15 lbs off, and freaking out a bit, so when things don't happen quick enough I feel hopeless and that the weight loss is pointless

2.  I'm trying to plan a trip to New England for Thanksgiving to see family.  STRESS!  I hate trying to jam in a whole lot of things in one week and see a lot of people whom I love but some of which get put out if I don't spend enough time with them.

3.  Just had parent/teacher conferences.  I would not know that one of the children was mine from the conference.  Her teacher said she was "quiet and keeps to herself, doesn't answer much and when she does it is in a small voice and she sucks her thumb all day."  The thumb sucking is true, the rest is not my child.  This is my extremely social, friendly, hardly ever shuts up child.  So this made me sad.  Why is my child not thriving at school?  She's super smart and ahead of everything but still.  Not knowing what is going on to make her behave that way upsets me.  I think the teacher is very capable (although not super warm and fuzzy).

So that's the skinny that's keeping me from becoming skinny right now.  I'm back on the to workout...


  1. I know how you feel about trying to cram visiting family in a small amount of time. My in-laws both live out of state. Just don't stress about it see as many as you can. Plan ahead maybe you can have one large get together.

  2. Yeah, sometimes life is just so ueber-busy. Don't let it stand in your way, who knows how much time we have got left?

    As for your daughter - that's sad, and you should try to find out what's behind it.

  3. The farther along I get in this journey the more I learn about how every aspect of life can affect my eating. It's very interesting to me. When we learn through days/weeks like these we gain the knowledge of how to combat those situations in the future.