Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Under Pressure

Yesterdays facebook post:  Success is Great - The pressure to remain successful and not become a failure, not so much!

I don't know why I put so much pressure on myself.  I know there's a lot of things going on:
First:  I'm close to that 100 lbs lost mark and we all know numbers can be a hurdle
Second:  I am now the weight that I said I wanted to be in order to try to have a baby...
Third:  I was on the back cover of our Health Club newsletter this month that was mailed out to thousands of people....


I wonder if my fear of failure is really a fear of people not talking to me anymore if I don't continue on this path.  Now, I know I am losing weight for me and me only....but still.   I grew up with very little affirmation or direction in life.  For the first time in my life, I'm getting accolades right and left.  People are talking to me, taking an interest in me.  So I wonder if really the pressure I feel is really the fear of rejection and abandonment that has plagued me my whole life....

Terribly bad eating weekend.  Terrible. 

4 comments:

  1. Today is a new day and you can make it great!!!

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  2. Thanks for being so honest here, Jodie. That's what it takes to get the self destructive thoughts out of our heads so that we can remember what we want to achieve. You're doing great - the feelings are part of the whole picture of why we have misused food and ended up weighing too much. The feelings and the cravings will pass, one way or another. Whether we eat them away or wait them out an stay clean - they will pass. What happened this weekend means nothing. It's what happens today that matters. You're a winner!

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  3. Will be lifting you up in prayer. Isn't it interesting how so close to victory your mind wants to steal the joy from you? You are such an inspiration and there are many of us who will always be so glad you've shared your journey with us.

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  4. Talk yourself out of this. Dwelling on the past and the "what ifs" and the "if onlys" is not really helpful anyway. You are who you are, you are at this point in your life, and everything is possible.

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