Sunday, February 21, 2016

You need to be You, I need to be me...

I ran into a friend yesterday at the Oscar Shorts Festival.  I hadn't seen her in a long while and the last communication we had was regarding how I was going to stop inviting her over to do things, because every time she turned me down.  It was an honest conversation.  I told her I am still her friend, but I couldn't continue feeling rejected.  She accepted that so well and explained she just isn't a people person like that and she really  likes keeping to herself.

When we were chatting about that yesterday, I said something that was rather profound, but so full of truth.  I told her "You need to be who you are and do what you need for you, and I need to be me and do what I need for me."  It was kind of a cathartic moment.  I thought about it and realized that noone should try to be what I need them to be for ME.  I think I get caught up in that a lot.  If they loved me they would.... If they really cared they would have.... 

My sister in law once told my brother when he asked her to tone down a bit (she's quite gregarious and a fashion plate) in front of our family and she told him "You be you, and I'll be me"

Why is this so hard for people. 

I am thoughtful.  I think about people all the time.  I'm a people pleaser.  But that is not every one.  Everyone should not have to be like me.    I wish that someday I will meet someone like me.  Someone who send flowers to a friend just to let her know you were thinking about her.  Someone who calls me from a store because something I mentioned was on sale and would she like me to pick it up for her.  The little things..

But for now, I will be making more efforts at accepting people for who they are and not who I want them to be towards me.  I think there will be freedom in that.  Freedom to be exactly who I want to be and not trying to make myself into what I think others want me to be.

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