Friday, February 5, 2016

It's not depriving myself if I don't want it

I've been having a lot of success lately in turning down food.  Even tonight, at a birthday party, I turned down a piece of Portillo's chocolate cake.  Now, if you aren't from this geographic area, you may not know how good and rich and moist this cake is.  The restaurant actually makes a chocolate shake out of this cake, it's that good! 

Some may say I shouldn't deprive myself of treats, but I can honestly say that, as much as I LOVE chocolate cake, I didn't really want it.  I worked out twice today (dance and yoga) and I really didn't want to undo all of that hard work for a few minutes of eating cake.   I am thankful that there were no food "pushers" at this party.  They understand what I'm trying to do and don't want to sabotage my efforts.

I don't always deprive myself.  Yesterday, I made cookies with my girls and ate 2 of them.   I was not having the best day, and I am well aware that is probably why I ate the cookies.  However, I had no guilt about it.  I texted a friend and told her that was the first pure sugary treat that I have had in over a month.  I have no shame about it.

And I have no shame turning down food.  There is no law written that says "Thou must eat everything that is offered to you!"

I read somewhere that when you are working on something like weight loss and you start to flounder or think about floundering, that you should ask yourself if your goal is important to YOU.  If it is, then that might give you the strength to pull yourself together.  If it's not that important, you'll probably just give in.

Losing weight IS important to me.  I lost myself the last few years to depression and grief.  But I'm finding myself again, and part of that includes losing weight.  It IS important.  *I* am important.  That chocolate cake is NOT.

So, if people say "You shouldn't deprive yourself of every treat", I will say I don't and I won't.  If the food is that important to me, I will eat it.  But right now, at least for today, I don't want my cake and I don't want to eat it. 


  1. I am in the depression and grief stage. I just can't stay focused.

    1. It's so hard. It has taken me a long time to get to this present moment since my father passed. When you love deep, grief is long. Just keep slogging forward and you'll come out in your time... Thanks for the comment!

  2. My best friend passed away from a brief illness in October. He was 36. We spend so much time together that every still just feels "off." My Mother-In-Law passed away in July, and it has been very hard for my husband of course. My Dad passed away almost 9 years ago. I believe grief is just something you don't truly understand until you are dealing with it yourself and yet everyone deals with it differently.